06:31 AM: Turn off the alarm, go back to sleep.
07:00 AM: Wake up to my cell phone alarm clock ringing the tune, Ode to Joy.
07:01 AM: Curse my lot for being a drone who works a 9 to whenever-my-boss-thinks-it's-appropriate-for-me-to-leave-for-the-night job, and get my ass up.
07:05 AM: Begin my morning ritual.
07:45 AM: Snuggle in the iPod earphones, turn the iPod on, "Do a little dance, get down tonight," and storm out of the apartment.
07:50 AM: Fight off small, obnoxious, Asian ladies who push and elbow their way through the sliding Subway door; avoid getting knocked over by the said vicious ladies clawing over each other to get seats.
07:55 AM: Take out "Wicked" and transport myself to Oz. Blank out the streaming thoughts of my many various ways of dying.
08:28 AM: Arrive. Climb up the stairs and head straight into the deli. Get a bagel with cream cheese.
08:40 AM: Arrive at work. Get coffee from the kitchen. Eat! Must nourish myself if I want to survive the day.
09:03 AM: Make a "solid" offering to the porcelain God.
09:10 AM: Start going down my work "To Do" list. Then every 10 minutes ask, "why am I here?"
11:00 AMish: Take my first cigarette break with a coworker. Listen to him bitch; keep myself from poking my eyes out with the burning end of the fag.
01:00 PMish: Grab something from the deli. Bring it back to the office, while moaning the lot I have corner myself into. Oh, if I find an opening from doing work, contemplate replying back to the comments left on my blog or to the e-mails I've received from the readers.
01:10 PM: Start formulating plans of my fabulous deaths to rehash during my morning commute tomorrow.
02:30 PMish: Take my second let's-get-lung-cancer hiatus.
02:40 PM: Start formulating plans to eliminate the people who are giving me grief with work.
04:30 PMish: Take my last drag of the day.
05:00 PM: (HOPEFULLY) Jump out the window or take the elevator down to a temporary reprieve.
05:20 PM: Meet my friends to get opera tickets. We're going to enjoy a night of La Boheme.
05:45 PM: Walk around with said friends debating where to have dinner, and have the following conversation:
Me: So, where are we going for dinner?07:15 PM: Head over to the Met. Enjoy the opera. Let the music soothe the weary day away. Be thankful to have friends. Be thankful to share moments with people who, in some small way, give a damn about you.
Her: Zagat says so-and-so place is good.
Me: Okay, let's go.
Him: Yeah.
Her: Um, it's kinda pricey, though.
Me: Okay, whatever.
Her: Oh, I hear this place is good, too. (Him and Her walk over to the display menu.)
Him: Hmm...
Her: Hmm...
Me: So?
Him: Oh, you know what? The so-and-so place up at so-and-so street is good. It's not too expensive, either.
Me: Okay. How far is it?
Him: It's a few blocks up.
Me: Oh. Hmm... Fine, fine, let's go.
Her: You know, Zagat says so-and-so restaurant isn't too expensive, and it's only one block away from here.
Him: Um, yeah, why not?!
Her: But it's the other way. Let's just go to the other place.
Him: No, no, no.
Me: So, where are we going for dinner?
(Repeat from the top.)
10:30 PM: Head underground. Get myself home for a good night's sleep. If that's possible.
12:00 AM: Vegetate for an hour or go straight to bed.
Addendum (11/16/05 11:10 PM): The day went exactly as scheduled. Well, not exactly, but pretty damn close.
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